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We don’t really mean it dudes….;-)

More than half of women offer to pay on a date (but don’t really mean it) and younger couples are more likely to split the bill

  • Men still pay for most expenses even after dating for a while
  • But 64 per cent of men say women should share the cost of dating
  • Three quarters say they still feel guilty about taking their date’s money
  • Couples in their 20s are most likely to split the bill between them


More than half of women offer to pay the bill on a date – but most still hope the man turns them down, a study has found.

Fifty seven per cent said they volunteered to pay their share, although 44 per cent preferred not to.

More than a third, 39 per cent, admitted that any offer they made was empty and they hoped their date would reject it.

Two-thirds of men questioned, 64 per cent, said they believe women should pay their share. 

But despite this, over three quarters, 76 per cent, admitted to feeling guilty for accepting payment.

Researchers at Chapman University, New York, found men still covered the lion’s share of dating costs, despite the breadwinning burden being shared in eight out of ten marriages. 

However, they claim ‘the deep-rooted courtship ritual around who pays’ is changing.

Couples in their 20s are more likely to be open to equality than older couples, but researchers said attitudes were changing across all ages, incomes and levels of education.

Pugh cartoon

According to the study, 40 per cent of couples share the bills at least partially during their first month of dating and this increased to more than 70 per cent after six months.

Dr David Frederick, Assistant Professor of Psychology at Chapman University, said: ‘Some gendered practices are more resistant to change than others; for example, the acceptance of women in the workplace versus holding onto traditional notions of chivalry.’

The results were presented in New York to the American Sociological Association’s 108th Annual Meeting, where academics gathered to discuss inequality on modern societies.


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